Friday, 10 February 2012
For as long as I can remember I have been a daydreamer. I often get very carried away with my thoughts, particularly when I'm on my own and especially when I'm driving, and before you know it I have completely forgotten where I am and what I'm doing. I know this sounds extremely unsafe, but believe me, I am that used to it that my subconscious keeps me alive.
I can't say I daydream about one thing in particular, but one recurring theme recently seems to be living somewhere new. I daydream about living in a bright, open, airy apartment in Barcelona, drinking peppermint tea, reading a newspaper and leaving the windows open to make the heat more bearable. I also daydream about living in New York, in a sky-rise apartment overlooking Manhattan, drinking coffee, walking through central park and living my dream career as a photographer. Most recently I have been daydreaming about living in Paris, visiting the Champs Elysees and the Eiffel Tower, going to countless fashion shows and writing down every experience I have.
However, lately I have found myself feeling somewhat guilty about my daydreaming. In these daydreams I am living in a completely different country and leading a completely different lifestyle. If, in my daydreams, I am aspiring to live my life in Barcelona or New York or Paris, does that mean I am unhappy with my life as it is? Well, the answer is no, I can assure you. Does daydreaming about a different lifestyle mean I am unhappy with where my career is heading? Perhaps. Yet surely this is selfish, as so many people across the world would give anything to be where I am now. The truth is, I don't have the job I want, or live somewhere glamorous, or have a lot of money. I have two part-time jobs, living my life day by day to see what I can and cannot afford. But shouldn't I be looking at the bigger picture?
I have TWO jobs. Not one, but two. So many people these days can't even find one job and I am complaining about not having the career I want. Secondly, I have an amazing boyfriend, wonderful friends and a family which I wouldn't change for the world. Thirdly, I am young. One of my greatest fears is suddenly being 80 years old and having countless regrets. So far, I have nothing I regret about my life, and any mistakes I have made I have certainly learnt a lot from. Not to forget I have my health, which so many people do not.
What I am trying to say is, be happy with what you have. There is absolutely nothing wrong with daydreaming about a better life, or wanting more for yourself, or wishing you had more money, or aspiring to live somewhere new. However if you do want these things, don't let it erase your view of what you have right now. If you are having a hard time, remember to appreciate and concentrate on the good things in your life, because there is always someone worse off than you. Across the world are people who have to walk miles each day just for a drink of clean water, and single mothers with six children who worry about buying food and paying bills, and cancer patients who have no family left to comfort them. These are the kind of situations I like to think about in my head when I start to feel like my life is going nowhere. My life is beautiful. If I were to look from the outside in on my life, I would think, "That girl is incredibly lucky." And as long as I have my loved ones, honestly, there is nothing more I could ask for. It doesn't get any better than that.
And I know it's not Barcelona, or New York, or Paris... but where I live isn't bad at all, really.